MUSINGS ON CHRISTIAN HARMONY, #5: Conflict and opportunity

Years ago I was at a Bible conference on Philippians 4, a chapter which, among other things, mentions two Christian women who were at odds. (Imagine being told that God put your name in the Bible! Then imagine finding out it’s because you were arguing.) Anyway, one person at the conference made the comment that it’s simply normal Christian life for conflicts to happen.

I considered that. It’s true, but it doesn’t go far enough. Normal Christian life is when we deal with conflict, which is the point in Philippians 4. There is so much to say about this subject, but I will focus here on just one point: Every Conflict Is An Opportunity (capital letters added to get your attention).

Think about that. It’s tremendous, actually! Many Bible passages teach us how to address conflict, but our only opportunity to apply them is when we face conflict. It’s our big chance to show that the Bible way of living works. In a weird way, it’s almost exciting to be able to say, “Wow, we aren’t getting along! Now we have a chance to do what God says to do when that happens!”

But we don’t do that, do we? We have reproduced the world’s problems in the Church. We avoid people we disagree with; we shun them; we block them; we mock their ideas and attack their character; we speak against them; we tell others to be careful around them; and we hold grudges, sometimes for years. If the Lord Jesus wept at the grave of Lazarus because of what sin had done in the world, is He not also grieved because of what conflict has done to relationships in the Church?

In a world stained by conflicts, it ought to be that non-Christians say to each other, “Why can’t we get along like those Christians? What do they have that allows them to address conflicts so effectively?” Instead, our divisive behavior in the Church is a byword and a reproach, a mockery of the unity Christ has established by giving Himself.

We Christians have allowed conflicts to divide us on Facebook and social media. We have allowed conflicts to divide local gatherings of believers. We have even allowed conflicts to divide our families. Should it ever be the case that one Christian simply refuses to speak to another? 

We have to change the words and expressions we use. Don’t belittle another believer. Jesus Christ never wanted to win an argument. He wanted to win a person. And today it is still a spiritual victory every time a conflict is addressed and a relationship is preserved. Every conflict is an opportunity to emphasize that I value not just ideas but you.

Current events are pretty tense right now. Different Christians see things differently, and discord is never far away. But don’t let a good conflict go to waste! This takes Very Hard Work, but the outcome will be beautiful. It’s your next opportunity to gain a spiritual victory for the glory of God through Christian harmony.